No place like home

[Lady Trevelyan]

There was nothing quite like coming back to MI6 after a long hard and arduous assignment. Alec smiled to himself s he propped his feet up upon his desk and leaned back in his chair. It was good to be back home. That last mission had not been one of his most plesant and he wanted nothing more than to drown the memories in a big jug of alchohol.

He hummed to himself as he too a large swig from his cup. As long as he didn't see M anymore today, it would prove to be the best day he'd have in a long time.

Sadly, it was going to prove that he was going to have a more difficult day than he wanted. Guess the old saying is true... Alec mused, there's no place like home.

[mysteriouslady]

Sebastian Hawthorne walked past the homeless man in the alley. He stopped a few feet away, and walked back.

The homeless man looked up at him, and smiled a toothless grin.

Sebastian dropped a one pound coin in the man's lap. "Get lost."

The man grabbed the coin, mumbled a "thank ya," and scurried away.

Sebastian looked through his black sunglasses, making sure the man was gone. He straightened the collar of his white silk shirt and adjusted his white tie. It wasn't usually this hot in London, but he was blazing in his black suit.

Making sure no one was looking, he walked down the alley until he reached an old telephone booth. Opening it up, Sebastian walked in. Once again making sure no one was looking, he kicked the blue-gray pebble near the corner of the booth and turned to the keypad of the phone. Typing in the code, he waited for the idiots at the security room to finally stop eating their donuts and let him in.

Sebastian preferred using the telephone booth entrances around London to get to the MI6 Building rather than the front door. There was always a crowd of people outside the front of the building, and he preferred it if his picture didn't wind up on the front page of some pathetic British tabloid.

He waited for the bottom of the booth to lower and take him to one of the underground entrances, but nothing happened.

Getting extremely impatient, Sebastian kicked the pebble again, and punched in the code on the keypad. Looking up at the microscopic camera that was camouflaged as an ant caught in a spiderweb, Sebastian stuck up his middle finger.

Finally, the floor started to lower. Although he expected it, Sebastian couldn't get over the fact that the thing went so d**n fast. He bet that the security guards controlled the speed, and it wasn't that fast for any other agent that used that entrance.

The booth stopped and its door opened. Sebastian brushed some dirt off his suit and stepped out. The fluorescent light that covered almost every inch of the second underground story made him almost shine.

As he walked toward the elevator that would lead him up to the third floor, where his desk was, many people called out to him, greeting him He ignored them, and continued walking.

Sebastian Hawthorne was not a people person.

The elevator doors dinged and Sebastian walked out. The third floor was almost empty that day. They had been liked that for a while. Most of the agents were mainly in the Soviet Union and other USSR-ally countries. Sebastian had just returned from China.

He almost shivered, remembering what had happened. Those Chinese women could give any top agent at the MI6 a run for his money.

Sebastian neared his desk, and then stopped. There, sitting on his chair, playing with his pens, was a scrawny little blond boy who was humming "Sweet Home Alabama."

Sebastian marched over and grabbed the man by the collar, lifting him off his chair. "Who the hell do you think you are and why the hell are you sitting in my chair at my desk?"

[Lady Trevelyan]

Alec was not at all pleased that his drinking and relaxing was being interrupted. He felt himself being yanked off of his seat and immediately pulled his gun out and pointed it at the man who'd just disrupted his relaxation time.

"Who the bloody hell are you?!" Alec demanded.

[mysteriouslady]

Sebastian scoffed, unable to believe the audacity of the blond man. Sebastian stood a little taller. He obviously towered the man by at least five inches.

"You're in my desk," Sebastian said simply. He noticed the open bottle and glass on the desk. "And, apparently, drinking my brandy."

"Excuse me," Alec said, "your desk? I think it's my desk. It's not like it has your name on it or anything."

Sebastian pointed to the nameplate sitting on the front edge of the desk, which clearly read Sebastian Hawthorne.

"I can assure you that you are not Sebastian Hawthorne," he said.

Alec coughed. On impulse, he hit the nameplate off. He smiled insolently. "Now it doesn't have your name."

"Just get off my desk."

"It's my desk," Alec said. "You look young, you're probably new. They probably accidentally gave you my desk because I've been away for so long. I've been in Russia for a while. They probably thought I died or something."

Sebastian almost sighed. He didn't want to resort to this. "You asked for it," he said, then slammed his fist into the other man's eye.

[Lady Trevelyan]

Alina Teralova was just on her way to her personal office that was located on the eatern part of the MI6 building when she heard a sound that could only be the sound of a sort of scuffle between two or more people.

Immediately whipping her small silencer out, she carefully walked around the side of the office and realized it was Alec's. The man has probably gotten himself into a pickly yet again... Alina sighed. 006 could never stay out of a fight.

Alina casually leaned around the doorframe and peered in to see Alec rolling around on the floor with another man who could only be described as dark and handsome. Alina wasn't familiar with him so she assumed he was somewhat new.

"You two are such children." She said in a condescending tone of voice and the two men leapt apart, each with a bruise on their face. Alec had a bloody lip, and the other man had a bloody nose. "Knock it off the both of you. This is ridiculous behavior from two dignified MI6 agents!"

"Good to see you again, Anya." Alec said, grinning. "Looking lovely as ever."

"Oh no you don't, Mr. 006. Flattery will get you no where." Alina shook her finger at him. "You should know better!"

Alec retorted with a pathetic, "He started it."

"I don't care who started it. I'm going to finish it." Alina said in an authoritive tone, even though she was the youngest of the three in the room. "I don't want any more pithy fights, from either of you or I'll report you to M."

She looked to Alec than to the other man. "What was the cause of this scuffle anyway?"

[mysteriouslady]

"He!" Alec pointed an accusing finger at Sebastian, "told me to get out of my desk!"

"It is my desk," Sebastian said scathingly.

Alina sighed impatiently. "Which one is it?"

Both men pointed to the nearby desk, and Alina rolled her eyes.

"Alec!" she cried, "that's not your desk!"

Sebastian smirked. "That's exactly what I've been trying to tell him, but the idiot wouldn't listen."

"He really is an idiot," Alina agreed.

"Hey!" Alec said indignantly. "Did they give him my desk or something? I can assure you that mine was by the window, facing the Thames!"

"That is true," Alina said, rolling her eyes. "But it's on the second floor, not the third floor."

"Oh," Alec was embarrassed. "But wait! Are you telling me he's a story higher than me?"

"I guess he's more important."

Sebastian left the two to tend to his nose, still smirking. The look on that man's face was worth a bloody nose.

[Lady Trevelyan]

"What do you mean 'more important'?!" Alec demanded.

"Oh, don't be such a child, 006." Alina rolled her eyes. "Drinking another man's brandy, the shame of it!"

"I get it. Thank you very much." Alec grumbled as they walked towards his office. "It was a simple mistake!"

"You've been working here longer than I have." Alina said, chuckling a little bit. "I swear, Alec, sometimes the fact that you have a brain is doubtable."

"Yes, well...'doubtable' isn't even a word." Alec retorted.

"You know, Bond is a lot more pleasant to be around than you sometimes." Alina said jokingly.

Alec rolled his eyes. "Where's the old scoundrel anyway?"

"Probably out getting drunk somewhere."

"Why go out when you can get pleasantly drunk here?" Alec pondered, "He's with a woman, no doubt."

"Isn't he always?"

"Good point." Alec agreed.

[mysteriouslady]

Sebastian splashed water on his face. He looked at the mirror and could see the marble restroom stalls' reflection.

They have enough money for marble bathrooms but not enough to give the agents new equipment, eh?

Wiping his face with a paper towel, he made sure his nose wasn't bleeding anymore. He was going to kill that blond idiot. But then again, torturing him was just as pleasing. Sebastian hoped someone would assign him and the idiot a mission in western Asia.

Throwing the paper in the trash-bin, Sebastian walked out of the men's restroom to his desk, intending to see what else the idiot had destroyed.

Sebastian picked up the half-empty Hors D'age brandy bottle. The SOB was definitely replacing it for him.

Putting the bottle down in disgust, Sebastian sat down in his chair, which was still warm from the idiot sitting in it. He was replacing that too.

Standing up, Sebastian wondered if his day could get any worse.

And it did.

"Hawthorne!"

Sebastian closed his eyes. Please, please, don't let it be her!

It was her.

Lei plopped down on his chair, resting her legs on his desk. "Good to see you're all better."

Sebastian frowned at her insolent act. "There'd be no need for me to get better if you had my back."

Lei scoffed. "It's not my fault you got shot. You should have been more observant. But no, you had to let a few women get in your way. By the way, I talked to M."

"You talked to M?" Sebastian said, surprised. "You're a child."

"I graduated summa cum laude from Harvard."

"Makes no difference in Britain."

"Go screw yourself."

Sebastian rolled his eyes. "Why did you talk to M?"

"I wanted to tell her how you should never be assigned a mission in Asia again," Lei said, "and she agreed. You seem to have a little fancy for Asian women. You're easily distracted by them."

"Oh," Sebastian scoffed, forgetting about Alec. "I can assure you that I have no interest in them at all."

Lei knew it was a direct attack against her, and smiled annoyingly.

Sebastian shot her a displeased look and walked away, intending to talk to M himself. He stopped a few feet away and turned around.

"And get off my desk."

[Lady Trevelyan]

The elevator beeped, signaling they'd reached their floor and Alec and Alina walked out. She was rambling on about how childish he was and he was doing his best to ignore her. The usual conversation between them.

"And if it happens again, 006, I'll make sure to notify M." Alina finished.

"Yes...well... we shan't let it happen again, than will we?" Alec said in a fakely enthusiastic tone.

"Don't patronize me." Alina snapped.

Alec held a playful glint in his eyes. "I'd never dream of it, Anya."

"Men!" Alina said in frusteration, throwing her hands up in the air. "I will never understand you men."

Alec chuckled as he slipped into his chair and watched her storm off. He popped the cork out of some vintage wine and leaned back. Perhaps his day would get better after all...after all, it couldn't get worse...

[mysteriouslady]

Lei watched as the elevator doors closed and took Sebastian up. Then she plopped right back down on his chair.

Curious, she started to inspect his desk, opening drawers and rummaging through them.

She knew what she did was wrong, but her whole life was wrong. Last time she checked, spying was not right. But then again, it was fun.

She knew she wasn't going to find anything incriminating, since Sebastian was smarter than that, but maybe he slipped up.

After ten minutes, all she discovered were loads of pens, paper, and various reading books. Sebastian led a very boring life.

So she decided to hack into his computer.

As she was typing in various passwords, Lei heard someone come up behind her.

She already knew who it was. "Hello, Alina."

Alina peered over Lei's head. "Your hacking skills were never that good."

"My hacking skills are better than yours," Lei said playfully. "Why does he have to have such a horrible password?"

"What's the hint?"

"Non questo è la parola d'ordine," Lei read.

"What?"

"This is not the password," Lei translated. "In Italian."

"What the hell is wrong with him?" Alina asked. "That's not a hint."

"The guy's on drugs," Lei said, typing in ThisIsNotThePassword.

"You can't actually believe that'll work."

"The thing with Sebastian is that he thinks people are too stupid to notice the obvious things." Lei clicked enter, and the welcome screen popped up.

[Lady Trevelyan]

"Well, I do have to hand it to you, Lei. You certainly are more intelligent than he gives you credit for." Alina said, taking a seat beside her. "I wonder what kind of dirt you can dig up on him."

Lei searched through the mainframe of the computer, searching for...well, anything really. Alin hovered over her, just as eager to find anything of interest. No luck until Lei clicked on one link and all of a sudden, a white screen came up. Then there was a picture of Sebastian on it.

"Lei-?" Alina began, but it was too late.

The online Sebastion started talking, "So...you thought to hack into my files did you? Bad choice. As I speak, a virus is filtering to your computer right now. That'll serve you right for hacking into my computer, Lei."

Lei and Aline shared looks of confusion before Lei ran off to fix her computer and hopefully save it from technological destruction...

[mysteriouslady]

Lei was going to kill that SOB.

Due to the MI6's advance technology, Sebastian's virus wouldn't destroy her computer. It'd probably give her countless annoying pop-ups asking her to be a paparazzi and shoot Brad Pitt though. Not to mention, her windows could close unexpectedly now and then.

All of that could be easily fixed with a call to the computer geeks downstairs, but the fact that Sebastian had upstaged her would forever make her cringe.

Alina leaned against Lei's desk. "He got you," she said, laughing.

Lei thought up of the best comeback she could think of. "Shut the hell up."

[Lady Trevelyan]

"Oh, real nice comeback. Alec could have come up with a better comeback...and that's pretty sad, considering." Alina commented as Lei began filtering the small virus out of her computer.

Alina then looked at her watch and cursed loudly. "Dammit!! I was suppose to be at a meeting ten minutes ago! I have to go! I'll see you later...good luck with the crab!"

And with that, Alina promptly made her exit...and just as gracefully, landed smack dab into Alec who was also in a hurry.

"It's just not my day..." Alec muttered.

[mysteriouslady]

Sebastian waited outside M's office. No, not an office. The lady practically had a suite.

After a while, he was finally let in.

Ready to complain about Lei, Sebastian opened his mouth, but was immediately cut off.

"Agent 013!" M said, smiling. "I was just about to call you. Now, I have a mission for you."

"So soon?"

M nodded. "You're one of my bests."

Sebastian was about to say thank you when the doors opened and Alec walked in.

The two men were definitely surprised to see each other.

"Ah, good," M said, "your partner's arrived."

[Lady Trevelyan]

Alec's first instinct was to demand to be put on a different assignment with a man that did not want to see him dead. His second instinct was to be quiet and allow M to talk and explain the mission that they were about to embark on.

Sadly, Alec went with the first choice. "With all due respect, I can't go with this lunatic!"

"And why, 006, can't you?" M queried, confused.

"He tried to kill me just a little under an hour ago! That's bloody why!" Alec said, his voice gaining volume.

"Calm down right now, 006!" M yelled.

Alec was instantly silent and glared at the other man who merely grinned evily. This was going to be a long meeting...